Crying, Pain & Tears: 1c

Loud crying happens between two people who are distant from one another. They communicate their pain by shouting because they are lacking intimacy. This is similar to a  person who feels distant from God and he cries out to Him bitterly. But the real way to communicate with God is by coming to Him and feeling uplifted by hearing His kind words. By feeling that God is bestowing on a person with a smiling face. When there is such a relationship the shouting is of a completely different sort.

When two people have a close relationship and are truly joined and they feel a relationship of give and take with one another, the communication is completely different. When one of them is feeling pain, he or she opens their heart softly and says, "The two of us are so close. How could this issue have arisen to cause such pain?" These soft words are a cry that causes the heart of the listener to tremble much more than the shouts of an outsider. By expressing how close they are, even the slightest distance cries out loudly as it simply shouldn't exist between two people who are so close.

Crying, Pain & Tears: 1b

Clearly it is impossible to always cry out quietly without making a sound; when people are in pain they tend to scream! A person can't really control how he screams; it's like a person who is ill who sighs uncontrollably even though he is well aware that it will do nothing to alleviate his pain. Even when he stops sighing, all he talks about is his pain which still sounds like his sighs and kvetches. He hasn't really eliminated his sighing.

There was once a person who was accustomed to shouting out to Hashem as he davened. His once had a guest at his home who was quite perplexed, "Why can't you just daven quietly? Why is this shouting necessary?" The two of them began to debate the propriety of shouting during davening but neither one was swayed. After a few days the guest left some money with his host for safekeeping. When he was ready to depart he requested that the host return the money. The host said that he had no knowledge of any money that belonged to his guest.

The guest began to shout, "Give me back my money! I see now that all of your davening and piety was false!." "Why are you shouting," asked the host, "can't you speak softly?" "How can I speak softly," shouted back the guest, "my heart is pounding and full of pain over the fact that you are taking what is mine!"

Returning the money, the host responded, "Now you understand. If you have pain in your heart, you don't speak softly."